Hanging By A Thread

Frayed rope about to break isolated over a white background

Oh my God, what happened? I thought, as I watched Paul climb out of the car.

It was evening, and he’d just pulled the car into the driveway. 

The instant he got out and I got a clear look at his face, I knew something was wrong.

And somehow, deep in my gut, I could feel it had something to do with me.

A churning bundle of nerves began clawing and digging at my insides as Paul came inside, set his keys down, and said four horrible words: “We need to talk.”

He took my hand, led me to the couch to sit, looked me right in the eyes and said, “Stacey, I’m leaving.”

And then he proceeded to describe, in excruciating detail, why he believed our relationship was total crap and was never going to work, no matter what we tried.

As we sat there and I listened to him rattle all this off, burning pressure began to build behind my eyes, and it pushed hot tears down my cheeks.

And before I knew it, I’d disintegrated into choking, uncontrollable sobs. 

I felt like I was unraveling from my very core—spilling open like a ripped sack of grain, with everything pouring out onto the floor, right there for him to see. I’d never felt so broken, or so vulnerable.

But then, the most amazing thing happened.

As I broke down, I also broke open

This crazy surge of love for Paul swarmed over me, and it was so strong, so overpowering, it actually scared me, because I’d never felt that kind of love for him before.

In fact, up until that moment, I didn’t believe it was possible for humans to even feel the kind of love I was feeling.

Right then I was forced to face the cold hard truth of that moment…

Love like this was possible for humans.

I feel this kind of love for PAUL (OMG).

And… I’m never going to get to live in this love, because I ruined it, and he’s walking out the door. 

The level of hopelessness that came over me, shook me to my core. 

The next words that came out of me through the sobs, surprised me even more than they surprised Paul…

“You’re right.” I cried to him… 

“Everything you’re saying is true. Our relationship is crap! You can only get so close to me because I have all these walls, and you don’t feel like there’s any room for you, because you think I don’t need you for anything. I’ve had one leg in and out leg out this whole time. But this is NOT who I really am. This is NOT the BEST of me! Please Paul. Please give me another chance.”

Paul stared at me … silently.

You see, Paul’s always been very sure of himself. He’s an insanely confident man. He rarely second guesses his decisions once his mind’s made up.

What I didn’t know in that moment was, he’d been contemplating our relationship for months before he told me he was leaving.

So he had made his mind up to do what he believed, in his heart, to be the right thing for us both, and end it.

But as I broke down, I opened. 

And in his words… he never experienced “That Stacey” before in all the years we had been together. He could FEEL the difference. The walls came crumbling down, he could feel the raw, open, real me… that he never felt before. 

He actually began to second-guess his decision to leave. Maybe I’m making a huge mistake by leaving, he thought to himself. If she could transform completely in this moment, how can I be so sure that nothing can change for us? He thought.

You may have heard us tell this story before. Most people don’t realize that we actually talked and cried all night long… 14 hours actually. We walked through hell and back together, during this dark night of the soul. And by the time morning came, Paul had agreed to give me another chance.

I kept my word to him, and dove head first into everything I could find about relationships, men, women, sex—you name it. And I implemented everything I learned.

But to my sheer and utter horror, it was not working!

Not only that, most of it actually backfired, which was beyond nerve-wracking. 

Our relationship was hanging by a thread, and ONE wrong word could end it. Forever.

No wonder the divorce rate in this country is over 50%. All the information out there on how to “fix” your relationship is complete and total shit!! I thought at one point, ready to rip my hair out in frustration.

But again, I was desperate, and like a dog with a bone, I was determined to not just “save” my relationship, but I knew that I was no longer willing to go through life being BLIND to this relationship stuff. Whether or not this worked to save my relationship with Paul, I was going to figure this shit out so I would never suffer like this again in my life!

I surged forward again, this time with a NEW strategy…and I did exactly what I’d set out to do.

…Wanna hear how it ends?

In Episode ONE of our Relationship Transformer Podcast, Paul and I are going to reveal exactly how we learned, from our real-life experience (no bullshit theory here) how ONE person can transform ANY relationship, create your unshakeable love, and unleash your passion…

ALL without needing your partner to participate…AND while remaining happily and authentically you, without compromise.

We’re also going to share how we realized that our calling in this lifetime is… helping people transform their relationships. It became so much more than just a “job.” It’s our calling.

Click here to learn all that, and so much more, in Episode One of our Relationship Transformer Podcast. 

Just choose your favorite place to listen, then click on the episode called “01: Hanging By A Thread.”

Sending love,

Stacey