A woman who enrolled in our Relationship Development QuickStart class posted recently that she couldn’t be with her partner unless he put her first.
That’s something we, as a society, have been conditioned to believe about relationships.
“If my partner doesn’t put me first, they’re selfish and I should find someone else.”
The problem is, it’s a classic example of demand relationship. “My partner has to do XYZ…or else.”
One of the biggest hurdles people encounter trying to unlearn demand relationship and embrace Relationship Development® is misunderstanding what demand relationship is.
Most people have no problem understanding the power player role of demand relationship.
It’s the person who has the leverage, and uses it to make demands, threats and ultimatums in order to get their needs met.
What trips a lot of people up is believing that if you’re not the power player, you’re automatically stuck in the non-power player role…which means settling, pleasing and compromising to get your needs met.
Well, I’m here to tell you that is complete and total crap!!!
You will never hear Paul or me tell you to step into the non-power player role of demand relationship, because it’s still demand relationship, and BOTH demand relationship roles are destructive to relationships.
You do NOT have to “be nice,” suck it up, stay quiet and “make” everyone else happy in order to have that Unshakeable Love and Unleashed Passion, anymore than you have to demand your spouse change in order to please you.
The key is to step out of demand relationship entirely, and into Relationship Development.
There are so many myths like this out there about relationships and what actually works, it took Paul and I three podcast episodes to debunk the most common ones.
In this first episode, Paul and I are talking about the #1 most common LIE that people believe about relationships…and how it’s keeping you STUCK.
These myths don’t have to hold you hostage any longer. Let’s set you free!