Have you ever had this experience?
You know what your partner WANTS you to do/say to make them happy, but YOU do NOT want to do/say that?
What to do?
Well, if you’ve been around the block for any period of time, I’m quite SURE that you have already heard or been told that you “MUST Compromise in Relationship!”
That is THE BIGGEST LIE going around!
When I hear “experts” saying that compromise is a key to successful relationship it infuriates me to no end!
Compromise is for SHIT!
Because compromise is based on you having good behavior to do something you don’t really want to do to please someone else! And NO ONE can have GOOD BEHAVIOR long term!
And pleasing in a relationship is CRAP because it’s phony…. and when you try to please someone, nothing is learned so the relationship doesn’t grow!
I can’t have good behavior long term! (Paul Martino will tell you that!)
Good Behavior! Pleasing other people….It doesn’t work…and it doesn’t feel good!
By definition, you cannot build an unshakable love on a foundation of such fragile and phony crap as good behavior and pleasing other people!
It doesn’t work! You can only have good behavior for so long before you get fed up and either go back to doing what you have wired yourself to do….OR keep score and start measuring what you are getting back in exchange for what you are doing to please them. (and keeping score is a relationship transformation killer)
There’s actually also a STRATEGIC reason why PLEASING in relationship does NOT work!
In the incredible book, Ask and It Is Given by Esther Hicks, they teach that we all have an Emotional Guidance Scale programed within us. Our emotions are actually giving us a clue as to when we are IN alignment with our best selves or OUT of alignment.
The chart below is from Ask and It Is Given.
This chart hangs in my office (in 2 locations actually) and we also include a print out of it for our students at every live event. You know why???
Because THIS CHART is one of the most powerful tools on the planet!
It’s really simple! Follow These Two Simple Steps!
(1) When you are on the RIGHT side of the EGS, do NOT take action. Because the result of your action will KEEP you firmly on the RIGHT side of the EGS.
(2) When you are on the LEFT side of the EGS, take action! Because the result of your action will KEEP you firmly on the LEFT side of the EGS!
Pleasing puts you firmly on the RIGHT side of the EGS!
HUGE AHA…. Do you want to know the PREDICTABLE boomerang emotion that you will feel after PLEASING someone??
I tell you at minute 1:35 in this video….
The KEY to creating the unshakable love and unleashed passion that you want is to get onto the LEFT side of the EGS before you take action!
Easier said than done, right?
I once taught this and someone in the audience said “well, I guess I’m never going to take any action for the rest of my days, because I’m always on the right side of that EGS.”
Hmmmm! That is NOT the outcome I am going to recommend! (who wants to LIVE their whole life in THAT yucky set of emotions! That’s no way to live!)
The Relationship Development tools and strategies that we teach (our toolbox) are specifically designed to get you from the RIGHT side of the EGS to the LEFT side of the EGS, so you can take action and get the results that you DO want!
If you think of the EGS as the WHY…. Then think of the RD tool box as the HOW-TO!
So, I’m asking you to PLEASE STOP PLEASING right now! You are destroying your relationships!
Are you ready to finally STOP pleasing others?
Do you want to learn how to do this without making everyone MAD at you?
Do you want the PROVEN real life tools and strategies that you can start using to bring the PASSION back to your relationship and create your Rock Solid Love?
Join Me for a 2-hour content packed free web class and get the solutions you need to create your unshakable love and unleashed passion!
Register here: RelationshipBreakthroughSecrets.com
See you there!