Paul and I are calling a Valentine’s Day do-over! Can you imagine it – the Love & Passion Lady has to call a Valentine’s Day do-over!
Look, you can’t make this stuff up. Real life happens.
Here’s a sample of what was going on at my house on February 14th this year. Rewind to the night before, February 13th, Paul is terribly sick with a fever, aches, sneezing, coughing and puking…the whole package. In between caring for him, I run down and create an awesome Valentine’s Day surprise for our kids on the kitchen table for when they wake up (that’s the picture above). Then run back upstairs to care for Paul, making sure that our kids stay sleeping and don’t wake up and see the surprise I planned.
Valentine’s Day morning, the kids come down stairs, ecstatic and giddy over the Valentine’s Day gifts and surprises awaiting them! I get them off to school and go back to caring for Paul in between work, which has been piling up since I’ve been taking care of a sick hubby (and a sick daughter the week before).
In between puking and sleeping Paul tells me how sorry he is that he can’t give me the Valentine’s Day that I deserve. He asks for a Do-Over after he is feeling well enough to really give it to me the way I deserve it. I think he meant give me a “Valentine’s Day” I deserve, but now that I hear that again, he could have been referring to something else 😉
So here I am, the Love & Passion Lady, thrilled at the frenzy and excitement of all the couples enrolling in Love and Passion Coach University, getting loads of emails wishing me a Happy Valentine’s Day and watching all the messages flood my way commenting on how people can’t even imagine what MY Valentine’s Day must be like.
But you know what? I’ve learned something over the years.
Dates on a calendar, holidays or occasions do NOT make things special. You CAN celebrate Valentine’s Day on March 9th, you CAN celebrate your BIG anniversary in year eleven instead of year ten and you CAN celebrate your wedding with 150 of your closest friends 4 months before you actually run off to Jamaica and get married in a private ceremony on the beach.
Every day that you have on this planet is a day for you to create! I don’t care what the date is on the calendar, what year birthday it is for you or what the occasion….create the days of your life so they SING for you and your lover…when it works for you!
So, this year everyone else’s Valentine’s Day was on a Thursday in February when my lover happened to be passed out with a fever in between hurling. That was not MY Valentine’s Day. That was my “take care of your incredible sick husband, create some love magic for your kids and stay on top of your work” day.
It’s just like the metaphor that Paul tells our 9 year old son Jake all the time…There are 3 doors in front of you, two are wide open, but your head is focused on the one door that is shut. You are so focused on the door that is closed, that you never even walk through the other two that are open to see what they might hold for you.
I made a decision not to focus on it being “Valentine’s Day” on February 14th this year. We called for a do-over, and then it just became a plain old Thursday for me!
Some people might say “but it WAS Valentine’s Day” “it’s a fact”. And they would be right! It IS a fact! Lots of the STORIES that we tell ourselves about why we can’t have what we want are true too. The question isn’t whether it’s true or not, the question is whether it’s serving you or not.
You can do the same thing I did. Whatever that day is in your MIND…it can become a plain old Thursday for you too!
So I ask you, what closed door have you been focused on that is not serving you? What story (true or otherwise) have you been holding onto that does not empower you? Was there a holiday, a date on the calendar or a special occasion that didn’t meet your expectations and you are carrying a sense of LOSS about it?
Whether it’s something that passed or a future disappointment yet to come, call a do-over, change the meaning for yourself, look at the door that is open…just make it work for you and your loved ones! No matter what the day was “supposed” to be!
As for me, I am excited to anticipate my very special Valentine’s Day which awaits me when Paul is well enough to “give it to me the way I deserve”. Yeah, now that I hear that in my head again, I definitely think he was talking about the other thing!!!
Sending love to you…on just a plain old Friday!